When you’re considering egg donation, you have to have a couples counselling session with an egg donation specialist to make sure you are aware of everything that goes with having a baby in that way, and that the counsellor thinks you are ok to go ahead. When I got my diagnosis, I called the counsellor straight away to try and arrange a session, but she told me to take a couple of weeks to let it all sink in and deal with the menopause diagnosis first, as she thought it would make the next step towards egg donation easier. I have struggled to unwind the two, but taking the extra time was definitely the right decision. We had our session today and I have to say, it was so much more helpful than the individual sessions I had. And I think it was really good for Mr M too. Our lovely counsellor ran through the legalities of having a donor that was from Spain (which was the route we were going to go down as our consultant had an international programme with a clinic over there), and some of the issues that might arise. In Spain, egg donation is completely anonymous, so she talked us through how we might bring up the subject with our child when they were old enough to understand and how we might deal with questions the child might have about where they came from. Mr M and I had talked about all this many times, and we had decided that, except for a few very close friends and family, we wouldn’t tell anyone that we had conceived (if we were lucky enough for it to work) through egg donation, and would rather wait to tell others until we had told our child. We didn’t want them finding out by mistake from anyone else. But we were adamant that as soon as they were old enough to understand, we would tell them. The counsellor pointed out some of the issues or questions the child might have about not knowing where the egg they were conceived from came from, such as their medical family history, or just curiosity about who donated the egg. These might be difficult conversations for the future, but ones we were fully prepared to have in a completely open way. She reassured us that she would be able to write a letter to our consultant confirming that she thought we were suitable to go ahead and we came out of the session with smiles on our faces. I think it was good for Mr M to talk through the practicalities with an expert, and I think it seemed to put his mind at ease more about me being ready for it as well. Another step closer today.